Its the last day of Twenty-oh-Nine.

I renamed my bunny. He/She is now called Timmi. And im giving my bunny away to Sihui for a week coz im gg Genting on Sunday and thr will be nobody in hall starting today to feed it. Poor darling. It got more endearing today, climbing onto the edge of the small carrier when we were in the car today, sniffing away.

Im so gonna slp aft this. I just got home. Ben n I fetched Timmi to Sihui's hse..at like...4am. So gonna miss Timmi! But im looking forward to our holiday in Genting too!

Perfect to start a new year.

And as usual u gotta look back in the year and see what u've accomplished and what u've not done.

Everything happens for a reason. It has been a bitter and sweet year for me.

I've loved and lost. Loved the wrong person, lost myself. It is not wrong to love stupidly if the person u love loves you. But if that person treats u like shit, watever u do is plain stupidity on ur part. But oh wells it happened. But because of that, i've learnt to love myself more and im learning to love the person whois deserving of my love.

I've found. I've found myself. I've found what i can be. Im not like a lardball anymore. I finally took salsa and exotic dance. Met ppl from all walks of life. Which means i get to knw more abt different ppl and their lifestyles. Because of them im appreciating that having fun does not equate to not having values. (Can't believe i was stupid enuf to take in that crap.) In fact im quite proud of myself that i can be a party animal or a bookworm or a kid or a lady....anything that i want myself to be and fulfilling these roles that i play.

Up my market value. That's what i've been doing, and what im gonna continue doing in 2010.

And i've found what i wanna be. Yea, like what Patrick termed, the holy grail. But if i dun make that small step, i will nv be closer to that grail. Im eagerly waiting for the day when i can say "Smell it, now take it."

Marvin is right. Youth is indeed my trump card. Coming 2010, vengeance is the drive. Love is the inspiration.

So 2010, i look forward to my license, my language classes, my camera, dance, and at the end of the year, my Jazz. Sry baby, still no manual car for you. But if u pester me hard enuf i might just get that Cerato Forte instead of a car with no backside.

One thing's for sure though, i will drive u around. =)

You can of coz choose to up ur insurance premium b4 then. =p

It has been a very rough year for me, but i have to say you're the best thing that has happened to me in 2009.

Quoting Mei Ling, "The best things in life, are not things."

Goodnight, and good morning. On the last day of twenty-oh-nine.

And no, im never looking back again. Once, is enough. And that is why they have the old cliche which goes, 'once and for all'.

It's crazy sitting in a black n yellow Lancer with blue n purple lights lining the inside, from door to floor.

And sitting it all the way to customs. Gdness. Haha.

Today's trip to JB is really enjoyable tho im nt feeling v well. I did the very first manicure and pedicure in my life! Now i've gotten myself French nails n i feel more like a normal girl! Haha. And Han got a "chic bob", as what Yvonne termed it. Her new hair is REALLY VERY NICE! Yvonne Shaza n myself were like touching her hair after that coz its really nice to touch! Not to mention she also look good in it!

Ben make a great Daddy for Pork-I. He took care of it for the entire day while i was away! Thank you my dear =)

Yes, that's the name of our lil darling, Pork-I. =)

Without any complaining or grumbling, Ben drove me around for the entire day today from Clarke Quay for dentist, to Suntec to collect our bunny and then sending me to and from dance@ PA.

Are there better and stronger substitutions for words like "Touched" and "Grateful" coz i really need them.

Thank you my dear. I hate it that i can only say this four words becoz i wished i can do more than that. I just wanna tell u again n again tt i really appreciate all that you've done for me! *hugz*

HERE'S OUR BUNNY!

Oops! She did it again. This tym a song about threesome, OR FOUR, on the floor =p



I wanna learn that dance. Ooh!

Woke up feeling like shit. But whn Ben ask if i wanna go to the farm, i went against my body's wishes. Haha.

So Ben drove us to Pasir Ris Farmway today and i saw many cute dogs and cats. And many many fishes!

I've never seen such humongous catfish in my life until today! Ben says one of them is abt 2 feet.

They should be in Sentosa instead of a farm in pasir ris!

And today i tried fish spa for my very first time.

Though i kinda expected it, but i still wanna say, that the amount of dead skin on my feet is....legendary.

Once i dip my legs into the pond, the ppl on either side of mi witnessed the majestic phenomenon of fishes ALL swarming towards me. And my legs were lost in a sea of black within seconds.

Not to mention that it felt DAMN TICKLISH. I was trying so hard not to scream.

Ben must have been so entertained just by watching me.

And i think the ppl around me must be thinking they came at the wrong time.

Now my legs are smooth and fair. =)

Stuck at hm now coz i cannot hold out liao so gave Ben's cousins gathering a miss. Came home and had a good 4 hrs slp.

And im still not feeling well. Zzz.

昨天收到一封简讯，让我惆怅了起来。

回复了，除了收到不少感触，还收到了迟来的，不幸的消息。

老奶奶过世了，虽然好久没有探望她了，听到消息时心里也很难过。

也很意外，虽然已经不再是家里的一分子了，她却还是那么关心着我。

告诉她我的近况，她还替我高兴，给我满满的祝福，还向我道歉说没能帮我什么。

这么好的妇人，为什么上帝会赐她那样的一个儿子，我永远都不会知道。

但我告诉她不要为她没有做过的事情道歉。

因为真的，不是她的错。

对感情处理不当的不是她。对感情不负责任的，也不是她。

只希望主能帮助这些曾经真心待我的一家人，都会渡过这个难关，不再难过。

Christmas Day was spent by starting the wee hrs with prawning at nothing. Zero catch for me.

Slept for 2 hrs and went for a meeting with God. I almost killed my boyfriend coz service was in Chinese and the pastor for some unknown reason talked longer than usual! It didn't help that the boyfriend understood nothing and he too only had 2 hrs of slp =X

But hey, this pastor delivers a more sincere holy communion than the last one i received! =)

Aft tt we went for lunch n window shopping and caught Alvin n Chipmunks 2.

OMG. THEODORE.

They repeated that "I had a nightmare, can i sleep with u?" scene again and he was still as cute!! *melts*

And the Chipettes are dwnright irritating bimbos. I still like Chipmunks better. Rarr!

Had Fish n Co for dinner n we walked past a pet shop.

And we're now proud parents of a Dutch-print Netherlands Dwarf Bunny!

It's a whirl. Crazy whirl.

Like how i just decided to pop by Xiaxue's blog and realised she's getting engaged!

Everyone deserves to be happy and be loved for who they are.

Like her, i really didn't think i'd have someone whois that crazily in love with me.

For the boyfriend, i know you can do anything for me, but i ain't gonna abuse this privilege of mine. Remember what i tell you, that u still gotta love yourself more when the tym calls for it. Im really ok even if you have to leave me for awhile to do what you have to do, and you needn't have to worry abt me all the tym coz i can take good care of myself. Knowing that i always take priority in your life is enough for me to want to do so. Yes you are right, that if someone doesn't treasures me, it doesn't mean someone else doesn't. I know you do, and i already am very thankful for that. =)

For my buddies, I WILL SEE YOU GUYS LATER. Haha. =)

Your god ain't mine.

It ain't my choice either, to stay in this house.

But i think im grown enuf, and sane enuf, to decide what i want to keep.

Im keeping that rabbit, for good.

Im sorry, but for some things, i just only had to inform you.

By asking, i was just being diplomatic.

Since diplomacy fails, im going to war.

Not that it's my first time anyway.

We had dinner at Kyomomoyama today and we headed to Brewerkz! =)

Had the Fruit Ale again and its still as good, just tt i kept burping like siao aft tt. The chilli fries were yummy too! =) Kinda farni tho wat i wanted is always out of stock. Like the homemade almond tofu at Kyomomoyama and the mashed potatoes at Brewerkz.

Ben surprised me w Twilight Book number 1. He knws tt i've been wanting to get it but i refuse to spend that money on myself for that, at least not now. And then ta-dah! He wrapped it for me, then wrapped it again w the card and magically pass it to me while i was still indulging in my excitement.

It really is a pleasant surprise! =) I really like the quote he wrote in the card:

"Love is what's in the room with u at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."

While waiting for bus today i wanted him to take the 56 home first, coz its like nearing midnite already. Yet he said something tt i'll never forget.

"You are my responsibility now..."

Im reminded of what Georgia commented recently on my Facebook, that action speaks volume.

And my cousin's FB status reads:

"Love means nothing when you don't know what it means to you."


This is gg to b the most meaningful Christmas that i would ever have.

It taught me many things that i ought to hv learnt long ago.

Thank you my dear, and thank you Lord. My most blessed Christmas ever, and that everything is real!

Shopping n eating n singing in JB has always been fun!

Add "Movies" to the list.

Haha. We bought tix to "Bodyguards and Assassins" and spent abt 2hrs 15mins watching our favourite actors getting killed one by one.

Donnie Yen had the stupidest death. Leon Lai had his equivalent to that of a martyr.

How can you do this to Donnie Yen!!! Rarr..

Ok i woke up late so im gonna go out shopping now b4 meeting B. at Clarke Quay! =)

On an unrelated note. I didn't know NIE has such a thing called release of exam results. And i got A- for....guess what....


ICT.



"...Is that true?!!!" (reads: It-tat-toooo")


Haha...and my ed psych prof really gave us the grade we asked for! I thought he was kidding when he told us to write our desired grades behind our reports during submission!

Caught this on MSN Singapore Lifestyle today:

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship."

That's why jerks are never truly satisfied. Coz they never had anything real in their lives that are there to stay. And then women who get hurt will find themselves devastated, not capable of loving again.

It takes 2 to tango, but then again..

..nobody's ever forced to dance, isn't it?

That's why we repeatedly get hurt, but we'll never stop falling in love. =)

It is confirmed.

Im gg Genting with Ben on January 3-5! Excited! =)

Back with PA today for modern dance class. Albert is all smiles today! And i shed more kilos!

Thou shalt not succeed in fattening me up! =p

On an unrelated note, the tapioca cake i bought frm some random bakery in the vicinity was quite nice. Haha.

JB TOMORROW. SHALL BUY MORE MIDNITE SNACKS FOR U MY DEAR! U can eat them together w my 爱心hot chocolate! =)

B4 i go, lemme recommend a new drink i found today.

Presenting to u, Pokka Genmai Green Tea!!



Healthy and yummy! Get a bottle today! =))



**********Edited@ 2.56am: Ben says he's going to sleep knowing that he has the most wonderful girl in his life. And with that im gg to sleep knowing that im being treasured for who i am, and as i continue to grow as a person. Am really grateful for all that you've given me. Thank you Lord for giving me the strength and miracle i need in my life. My belief used to sway when u did not give me the miracle i asked for.


But now i knw, that you had greater miracles in store for me. ♥

Popeyes is now in AMK Jubilee and coming to Toa Payoh soon!

Joyce will be spotted frequently eating Popeyes mashed potatoes.

OMG. Excited, totally.

Watched Avatar 3D with Ben today! And the movie is like 2.5 hrs long! But the graphics and effects are really worth the watch. =)



Take me to a place far far away.

And let's not come back, if we can help it.

I saw this site called Mabuk Monkey. Stupid name made me almost died laughing.

They sell alcohol btw.

Today had a long day out w Ben. And im really tired. Photos later!

Just read Jamie Yeo's blog on Tiger's scandal. And i tot thrs one part that's resonating.

Like I said, Tiger might have his reasons for cheating and I am sure the temptation for the highest earning and most successful sports personalities in the world must be huge. I am sure there are not many places this man can go without women throwing themselves at him but it's about how one deals with the crises in a relationship that define a man and a woman. It is easy and weak to cheat. We can all do it and in most cases we will remain unfulfilled, except for the temporary cheap thrill. It takes a lot of hard work to make a relationship really work but with that hard work comes a bond that is stronger and deeper than anything that can be gained any other way. Most people don't like hard work and so most people fall into the Tiger category of wrecking what they might have had. In the end, breaking up is fine, we do not all belong together but if we do decide to go our separate ways, we should at least do it with dignity and respect for ourselves and others.

Relationships ain't no happy affair.

At some point in ur life u're gonna be screaming ur heads off at each other, or talk about hw that 10k should be put into ur kids' funds rather than that new toy that u're gonna be getting.

It takes hard work for both parties in a rshp. And losers are those who do not want to put in that amount of effort, yet want to enjoy what everyone else around them is getting from their partners.

Cheap temporary thrill. Extensive permanent damage. It's all about choice. Right or wrong, they are still choices.

But let us all not forget, one choice leads to another.

Dear God,

I am happy.

And thank you for allowing me to see that i deserve to be happy and be loved.

Mum n Dad are healthy and happy.

Sis is finally coping well w studies.

Bro is having the tym of his life, overseas trip, chalet, and great friends.

And thrs Ben, whois always looking out for me and ever that patient and understanding.

I really have nothing to ask for.

Thank you for everything.

Gdnite.

♥ Joyce

Nearing 2am or so..I was just reading my book in bed..and the next thing i knw, its 3.33pm. I can really sleep.

But hey..it's the holidays, my prerogative.

I finally got my camera yesterday too! National Geographic may seem abit far, but im gonna make sure it isn't such a far-fetched idea afterall.

Momo joined the group "I should tell Joyce she is too skinny" today. But im happy with how i look now. And i nv went on any form of diet. Like im still eating Twisties and fruits b4 i fell aslp. Luckily there weren't half-chomped Twisties in my mouth. =X Ahh anyway, i just dun wish to eat that 2 inches back anymore since i've lost them already. It's just crazy how i was a lardball.

So the Levi's is still up for grabs, anyone whois W26 L31 come n buy!



Back to my book! Im hooked onto James Patterson again!

Oh Ben did i tell u tt u're the hero of the pool. Haha. Proud of you, really. =)

Went to check out ACRES today with Kian Wei and it's a pretty cool place dedicated to promoting animal welfare and raising awareness as well as to educate the public on cruelty against animals. Would love to b a volunteer under their Wildlife Guardians Team but the programme is currently unavailable. =(

Check out their site HERE.

On our way out it started raining, though we have our umbrellas it's still kinda bad to walk in tt weather.

Miraculously, someone stopped his car beside us and asked if we need a ride to the bus stop. Blessed to have such people around, god bless this kind soul too!

Went Vivo to walk walk. In the end just decided to buy some food for Ben to store in his room so he would hv stuff to eat whn he's hungry =) Afterwhich he brought me to Boon Lay mkt.

So i FINALLY tried the Nasi Lemak tt was still open even at 1am when i went past it last yr!

Then here's what happened:

Storekeeper: "You knw why just nw i see you i never call you nt?"

Me: "No?"

Storekeeper: "Coz you very pretty, outshine everyone, i see you i stun then cannot call you."

I laughed and said thank you. Makes my day. Not that my day was any bad to start with, compliments like this just makes u feel more pleasant =)

Went back to our table and told Ben abt it. He asked w a smile, "Never ask for discount?" Haha. He must be happy too. =)

You looked really good playing today. =)


Love the way u look at me.



Thou art love. ♥

I bought everything on my shopping list except for the camera's health. Uncle take already say repair no point, tell me get a new 1. Sobz. So while waiting for 兰姐 to tell mi wat camera she wans for Christmas....

...i bought myself a new camera. =X


Haha.


And we took our first picture today! Not with the new camera of coz. I placed my orders ytd, it's still on its way.

Had my last session of exotic dance too. The greatest takeaway from the class, was a nice arching back and a better posture. As to whether im more feminine or nt, i decided to just forget it. It lies in the eyes of the beholder anyway.



Feel damn dehydrated. Drank the Chardonnay i bought a few days back and i cnt believe i fell aslp without drinking loads of water! Zzzz. Today must go on heavy water parade liao.

Speaking of water, off to catch him in action, watching my first polo match ever. =)

Here's a toast to December, with love ♥

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." (Proverbs 31:30-31)

Today's shopping list:

1) Big Big external Hard Drive

2) Crumpler Bag for Sis

3) Camera's Health

4) Whatever i see along the way.

The last one is just a girl thing. Haha. =p

Salsa got difficult. Haha.

Im still in the sleeping mode.

Went AXS machine n was happily thinking that i dun hv to bring my bill in order to get it paid.

So i happily slot in my card and then they ask me to enter the amount to be paid.

I muttered "Shit" right under my breath.

So, i still have to remember how much i owe the bank afterall =X

Ben is back! And being as sweet as he always was, he offered to help me get that Iphone for Christmas. Touched.

But no dear, I will get it myself. =)

I was thinking about him and how thrs no auto roaming so thrs no way i can tell him i ate today.

When suddenly thrs this SMS coming in just 5 mins ago from him!

Apparently he was able to pick up signal frm whr he was, so he can sms me! =)

Today's ECP trip was really fun! And i hope i can get the camera fixed! Well done Han, u cycled almost 10km with us on ur not-so-first cycling trip!



Click for the full size image! =)

Yesterday saw me knocking on Ben's door delivering him breakfast. He has always been making time for me no matter how tired he was, so i thought i should be doing something for him else i would really be 没良心. His archer fishes are damn cute. He FINALLY seperated the bully tts severely injuring one of them. And this big blue bully that was always bullying them died right after jumping out of the small tank while we were out for lunch and my dose of chocolates @ JP.






Evening went JB to eat n drink w Dean n Sunny! Gosh they are like OMG-ly funny and fun people to hang out with. Had so much fun! And the food is nice!!! Han n Kiwi lets cab thr to eat someday too!

Minutes after Sunny dropped me at my hse, Ben came to have a drink w me at KPT aft picking up his cousin frm the airport! He really shouldn't have coz he looked really tired. But i guess since we won't be seeing each other for the next 2/3 days shall let him have his way this tym. =) He asked me "Are you a robot???" after hearing me say tt im still quite energetic. Lol. Yea baby imma robotic plant.

And plants don't eat bak gua. So u can forget about fattening me up. =P

So this is yesterday, and today will see me cycling with my buddies b4 Chingay rehearsal and aft rehearsal hopefully we'll continue our fun into dinner!

Happy, that my life has sincere ppl all around.

And happy, that i've found myself back.

I have wonderful frenz! I hv nv gone to Science Centre laughing so much before. Kian Wei n Nich are such great company to hang out with!

Body Worlds was AWESOME. I mean, minus the fact that no photography of any form was allowed, the exhibition was really interesting. Though it is worthy to note that a few of the bodies have tar-stained lungs. Haha. Like the On Pointe dancer n the Ring Gymnast.

So apparently ppl who exercise alot are not exactly the healthiest ppl on earth afterall. Haha.

I still can't imagine donating myself to be preserved through plastination and then allowing them to skin me, or seperate my bones, my muscles and my organs. Tts like...eew? These ppl are really amazing.

Aft the trip to the Science Centre i met Ben at JP to hv dinner. Big man was looking so nua after his polo training tt i feel abit bad getting him to come out. We had the seafood platter for 2 and it was so full! I hope i drank enuf water though. Gotta detox ALOT after a sudden surge in intake of seafood. Dun wanna get weird bumps.

And then thr was something life-changing! =)

Alright, why am i up bright n early at 8 in the morning? Coz i needa bathe n go for dance later! 2 days ago it was Korean MTV, i wonder wats on today! Patrick n Ammily! I miss having you guys around!

Advertorial:

I wanna sell my Levis Jean, 1 Slim cut 1 Boot cut. Jeans are like W26,L30. I shed too much lard so i cnt wear them without a belt now. And thrs no way im ever gg to eat back this amount of fats. Like, how did i even get so fat in the first place. Yucks.



Interested msg me. Interested in me pls dun msg me. =p

My fren Sunny wans to sell his Zara jeans, his PSP for 200 bucks w 1 game, and his Toyota VIOS 08 with Front Grille. I dunno hw am i ever gg to sell a car for him?! But i guess i can help posting. Haha.

Ok, now to meet Kian Wei and Nick to see Body Worlds!

Hey Ben, I just wanna say, thank you for helping me find my worth again. I never thought i could be the someone u see i was.

And thank you, for loving and respecting me.

He really does wonders. And im glad i've taken that step towards what He has for me.

Thank God for giving me such wonderful friends, and for giving me the strength to know that everything is going to be OK at the end of it all. =)

Nwadays im like a pig.

I ALWAYS doze off! I hv no idea why.

Went out with Ben ytd. For Ben and Jerry's and a walk around town ytd b4 gg for dance.

I've sinned again. I bought a book. Haha.

But hey i am happy. =)

Im glad i took that step He wants me to take. Now we shall see what He has for me.

Thank you for letting me know that i can be happy being myself again.

Gonna bathe n fly to school for dance now!

It sure feels gd to wake up and see Singapore Flyer w such beautiful lights when looking out of the window.

It sure feels gd to fall aslp knwing tt im in safe hands.

Thank you, for making me special. =)


p/s@3.44am: thnx for coming dwn to lim milo with me too. =)

I was a mother of 10 for 2 days.

The kids are really cute. I will call them sweet monsters. Haha. And riding on the bananaboat yesterday with the wind against my face and hair flying, im really beginning to c Xin Yu's point.

That there are so many other things that are important in life.

Thank you Camp SOLA. Though it was meant to motivate the kids, you motivate me to wanna find that equilibrium in my life again. =)

I know i shouldn't b drinking.

But seriously this 5 yrs old red wine tt i've stolen frm my fridge is damn good! It has a superb after taste!

And brother is back frm Thailand. Shall check tmr to c if he went to watch Thai gals show. =X

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